Let’s Talk About It: The Comparison Trap Is Real

When I first stepped into the online space with this business account, I did what so many of us do, I looked sideways.

At every scroll, there they were: the young, toned, polished “girl boss” business coaches with their curated feeds, glowing skin, and captions that flowed like magazine copy. They had slick branding, perfect lighting, and seemed to live in a world where everything matched, including their life and their marketing.

And me? I was sitting in my home office, at my heaviest weight, feeling like I didn’t belong.

That little voice in my head started whispering louder and louder: “You’re too old.” “You don’t look like them.” “You will be judged”

So, instead of showing up, I hid.

I sat on ideas. I delayed posts. I waited until I “looked better” to record stories. I told myself I wasn’t quite ready. And behind all of it? Comparison.

The Snap Out of It Moment

Then one morning, mid-scroll and mid self-doubt spiral, I snapped.

I grabbed a notebook and scribbled down a simple list: not of who I should be, but of who I actually am.

• I’m direct, no fluff, no nonsense
• I talk fast and I get my words all mixed up
• I love a rant and real conversations
• I care deeply about the people in my community

And suddenly, I could see it clearly: I don’t need to be anyone else. I just need to be more me.

That day, I filmed a story in my pyjamas with my hair a mess, cup of coffee in hand. Nothing fancy, nothing scripted, just me, chatting. And people responded. Because it was real.

What Happened When I Showed Up as Myself

From that moment, something shifted.

I started showing up every day, exactly as I was. I stopped worrying about angles or outfits and started focusing on what mattered: connection.

And guess what? I found my people. Not the ones who wanted curated content, but the ones who wanted real support, honest insights, and a mentor who wasn’t pretending to be perfect.

Through showing up as myself, I found not only my community, but my confidence. My voice got louder. My message got clearer. And my DMs? Full of “thank you for being real.”

5 Steps to Break Free from the Comparison Trap

If you’ve been holding back, comparing yourself to what everyone else is doing online, here’s how to stop:

1. Write Your Real List

Grab a pen and write down what makes you you. Not the curated version, the real one. What do you love about how you work? What makes your clients come back? That list is your reminder that you already bring value, just by being yourself.

2. Start Small but Be Consistent

You don’t need to share your life story tomorrow. Start with one story. One honest caption. One unfiltered post. Do it again the next day. Small steps, big shifts.

3. Mute the Noise

Unfollow or mute accounts that trigger your self-doubt. Your headspace matters more than your feed aesthetic. Protect it.

4. Talk to One Person

When you post, picture just one person who needs to hear what you’re saying. Not the masses. Not your competitors. One human. That’s how connection builds.

5. Remember: No One’s Judging You Like You Are

We are our own worst critics. Your audience? They’re not judging your hair, your lighting, or your outfit. They’re listening for your message. So give it to them.

What If You’re Feeling Stuck?

If this all feels confronting or overwhelming, you’re not alone.

As a small business mentor, I’ve had this exact conversation with so many clients lately. Especially those who are struggling to show up because of comparison, self-doubt, or the pressure to “look the part.”

Here’s what I want you to know:

You don’t need to have the perfect look, script, brand colours, or photo shoot to show up. You just need to show up as you are. Because that’s where the trust is built. That’s where your people connect with you. And that’s where your confidence grows.

Need someone to help you step into that? To work through the mindset blocks or the visibility fears?
Let’s chat. This is exactly what I’m here for.

Book an hour of power mentoring session with me here. 

Your People Can’t Find You If You’re Hiding

You don’t need to be the loudest, prettiest, most polished person in the room.

You need to be the real one. The one who shows up consistently. The one who leads with heart. The one who says, “This is me—and I can help you.”

• Write your real list.
• Talk to one person.
• Show your face.
• Protect your mindset.
• Keep showing up.

The people who need you? They’re not scrolling for perfection. They’re searching for connection. Let’s make sure they find you.

Need extra support?

You don’t have to figure this out alone. If you’re ready to step into your voice and show up with confidence, book a session with me here.

We’ll find your version of showing up. And I’ll be right here, cheering you on.

Lala xo

Loved this blog? Forward it to a business friend who needs this reminder. Let’s support each other to show up, just as we are.